Alas, the time has come: The time when I write my last blog
as a Peace Corps Volunteer. When (I
feel) I should be deep and insightful and really understand the lessons I
learned over the past two years of my life.
It’s a little harder to do it that way because of the circumstances my
service is ending under. However, I was
close to the end and definitely appreciate all the time I did have there.
The last couple of weeks here in the US
have been a time of adjusting. This country
is so big and unfriendly. It’s fast
paced beyond any reason and the things we have here are absolutely, 100%
ridiculous. At the same time, I love
driving in my car, being anonymous and not having to be under lock and key come
sundown.
I’m still upset that we had to leave. It brought me to tears again a few days
ago. It’s entirely unfair that we can
just up and leave. I gave my word to the
people to be there for two years and we’ve both been robbed of nearly four
months of time. (I like starting every
sentence with “I”.) Left behind in Honduras
are my friends and family. Left undone
and unfinished are projects that could have made a huge difference in many
people’s lives. Not just my own, but
those of 157 other volunteers.
However, it is what it is and I’m dealing with all the
associated emotions. There are good days
and there are bad. The Lord has blessed
me with a short-term job working at a non-profit I volunteered at before
leaving for Honduras. It will be a great opportunity to get good
work experience and even better to earn and save some money. Getting into a “normal” 9-5 will help me pass
the time and not be so bored. The plus
side is I love the work this agency does!
I’m also applying for jobs with the Peace Corps (stateside) and other
non-profits. I’ll go to grad school for
my Master’s eventually – once I figure out what I really need it in. Maybe I’ll learn I don’t need it! Once I’ve accumulated enough savings to start
my next adventure and still be responsible for my debt, then I’ll be on the go
again. That’s one definite lesson I
learned – I cannot do normal!
So, now comes the part when I’ve got to reflect and say ok,
“What did the last two years teach me?”
This is really off the cuff and by no means all inclusive, so let’s see
what I’m thinking…
I learned
that I am a chameleon. Eat like the
locals, live like the locals, talk like the locals, sympathize with them and at
times even empathize with them. I
wouldn’t think twice before throwing myself into the unknown again.
Patience IS
a virtue. I spent a ton of time waiting
over the past two years of my life. Each
time I was forced to wait just made me more patient.
Home is
where the heart is – not a physical address.
My heart knows three homes now.
No matter where I am I can build a home and create a family. I’ll never be alone because my heart is so
full.
As an
American I need to do a lot of good.
It’s so easy to lead a mundane life here and get caught up in the
“American Dream.” I’ve been blessed with
the opportunity to educate myself both traditionally and
non-traditionally. I honestly feel it is
my calling to “pay it forward.” I get so
much happiness out of helping people and that’s what I want my life to be
about. My life will be better when I’m
helping others help themselves.
I’ve got
oodles of confidence! In terms of self
confidence I’m a completely different person now than when I left two years
ago. I’m more confident in marketing
myself in the job market. The
experiences of the Peace Corps make me an amazing candidate and I will bring
amazing ideas and fresh perspectives to any work place. I’m even confident in my appearance! Two years being the target of men’s off handed
compliments (that annoyed the heck out of me) actually made me realize, “Yah, I
am pretty darn good looking.” Now, don’t
think I’m conceited. I’m still a woman
at the end of the day and will always fret over silly things. But 9 days out of 10, I feel darn good about
myself.
Perhaps,
the most important thing I learned is this: Honduras
is a beautiful country inside and out.
From evergreen pine forests covering the towering mountains reaching
heavenward to the cumulus cloud filled sky, to the island paradise with white
sand beaches and crystal blue water – you will see some of the most amazing
natural beauty in Honduras. Los
Catrachos (what Hondurans refer to themselves as) will go above and beyond
to welcome a stranger into their land.
The poorest of people will make the most immaculate feast their meager
ingredients can muster and serve it to you at their plastic table with fancy
place mat and piping hot coffee, just to say, “Welcome to my home.” A young boy will carry your 50 lb. suitcase four blocks from the
bus stop to the house down the pot hole filled dirt road. Your friend’s family will invite you to their
coffee farm on Sunday – a day typically spent with family in Honduras
– because they know you don’t have your own family to be with. Your landlady will feed your cat for weeks
while you travel. Small neighbor children
will bring you fresh fruit off the tree from their backyard. A work counterpart will drive you two hours
to the airport and decline taking gas money when offered him. Young girls will treat you like the hottest
pop star because you took time to teach them a class for 12 weeks. And the list goes on! I saw no lack of generosity from a people
that are supposedly needy. It’s a
terrible shame the rotten few are giving the country a bad wrap. I encourage you, nay – dare you to go beyond
what you read in the news and go see for yourself what an amazing country
Honduras is.
So, this is the end.
My 27 months became 23 and I spent the last one living in the US. It has happened for a reason. My Peace Corps Volunteer experience may end
today, but tomorrow begins the rest of my life as a Returned Peace Corps
Volunteer. I can forever share my love,
knowledge and experience of Honduras
with the world. What a blessing! Thank you all for reading and following my
adventures. “It was the best of times,
it was the worst of times. I’ve had the
time of my life. I’ll never let go. Don’t stop believing.”
PS – Update on my cat, Amor.
She’s in Tegucigalpa,
medically cleared for entrance into the US. We’re just waiting to see which flight she
can get home on. She should be reunited
with Frijoles and I within the next few days! :)
Vaya pues, cheque, que le vaya bien, que Dios te
bendiga, vaya con Dios y Amor y Frijoles
La Gringa
formerly in Honduras - Emily
Catracha de Corazon |